Singles Dances & Discussions

I was born in Beth Israel Hospital in Newark, N.J. on June 21st, 1943. It was on a Monday at about 4pm. My first memory of living in Newark, New Jersey is somewhat vague. But I do remember our first house. It was located on Milford Avenue in Newark.

My mother shared a hospital room with a lady with the last name of “Lazzara”. Her daughter “Lynn” was born on the very same day. Lynn and I would meet and become friends some 30-plus years later when we met in Middlesex County, New Jersey, a half hour away from our original birthplace in Newark.

We met at a Unitarian Church in Princeton, New Jersey at a Singles Dance.

The agenda was quite unusual in the fact that many who attended were extremely intelligent. The average IQ was far above any average area in New Jersey. Being from Piscataway, I didn’t consider myself a super student nor a wonder-kid. I was just an average guy whose focus was on music.

The agenda was very creative. It fit many of those who came to the dance. We would hear piped in music, usually rock and roll but not loud hard rock or acid rock. I would describe it as “soft rock”, with a mix of fast, slow and Latin, in a fair proportion.

The admission fee was six dollars, collected at the door. Each person would receive a ticket with a number on the back. At 9pm, each person would be assigned a particular numbered room. We would all check our ticket, not knowing what was supposed to come later.

We never knew in advance which numbered room which we would be assigned to. This way, if we would attend this event many times, we would get to meet (and HEAR) each person’s “story” and “ideas” which might add to a person’s true personality and likes and dislikes. The rules were very simple, “NOBODY is WRONG” …. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion, no matter what it was. “RESPECT EACH OTHER”, were the key words in each discussion group and in each room. If someone got out of line, an “enforcer” would be called in and that person would actually be removed! Great idea, I thought!

Rutgers, the State University, with its larger numbers of students were very well educated, but Princeton was an “Ivy League” School! Many of its famous alumni are far beyond most all college students or their alumni in America. Keeping this in mind, by attending these dances, I was truly becoming a “social-climber”.

The agenda was very creative. It fit many of those who came to the dance. We would hear piped in music, usually rock and roll but not loud hard rock or acid rock. I would describe it as soft rock with a tasteful mix of fast, slow and Latin rhythms, in a fair proportion.

The admission fee was six dollars, collected at the door. Each person would receive a ticket with a number on the back. At 9pm, each person would be assigned a particular numbered room. We would all check our ticket, not knowing what was supposed to happen later on.

We never knew in advance which numbered room which we would be assigned to. This way, if we would attend this event for many weeks, we would get to meet (and HEAR) each person’s “story” and “ideas” which might add to a person’s true personality with their likes and dislikes. The rules were simple, “NOBODY is WRONG” …. Everyone is entitled to their own opinion, no matter what it might be. “RESPECT” was the key word in each discussion group. If someone got out of line, an “enforcer” would be called in and that person would actually be removed! Great idea, I thought!

(With all the divisive political points of view, nowadays, I am sure this agenda would have resulted in fighting and hate speech from those who disagreed with others’ opinions on the original “topic”.)

This was the highlight of my social life during the period from 1962 to 1968. I was a ‘carefree bachelor’ and happy to be single. I drove a 1962 “gas-eating” Mercury Convertible until the top got stuck and was too expensive to repair! On weekends I was allowed to drive my father’s stripped-down,1960 Chevy Bel Air.

This Singles Group met every Friday Night. Many of those who attended the dance would scurry over to “Good Time Charlie’s”, the local pub to have a drink and a snack at about eleven o’clock. With no school or work for most of us, the next day gave us time to stay up late and not have to worry about the clock.

I met quite a few people there and many were gifted students, poets and arts students. All in all, a nice mix of folks both middle-aged and older. The common denominator was “Single”. Anyone who was a possible cheater wouldn’t even try to attend, especially if they came from the local New Jersey area.

I found this to be a very entertaining evening and looked forward to my Friday nights just about every week. BUT, when there was supposed to be a scheduled recording session, I would never give that up for a Singles Night out. Music was the focus of my life then and NOW!

This special Friday Night event was something which was a major memory which I will never forget.